Exactly How Does God Discipline?

I initially posted this over a year ago.  It continues to be one of the most popular posts I’ve ever done:

I read a book a while back where the author was attempting to illustrate godly correction. He quoted Hebrews 12:6-10 (”he whom the Lord loves He chastens/disciplines”) and then made the following statement: “God does not hesitate to hurt us if this is necessary to help us become mature sons and daughters of His.” He then told a personal story of when his two year old son had foot surgery. Each night, the father had to stretch the foot as a type of physical therapy. Of course, it was tremendously painful for the son, but in the end the father said it was “worth it” – an illustration of how our heavenly Father disciplines us. The surgery was a success. At that point, I stopped reading and thought to myself, “hurt us to help us?” I just can’t agree with that. But I wasn’t sure why. So, after some serious thinking, this is my answer.

Most people assume that God’s correction is painful. And sometimes that may be the case…but I’m not really buying it. Here’s why. Godly discipline and punishment are not synonymous. And God never said that they had to be in order for his will to be done or for discipline to be effective. After all discipline means “to disciple” not “to punish.” Disciplining brings about transformation. Punishment only brings outward conformity. Hebrews 12 talks of love correcting or disciplining us, but that verse also should be taken within the entire context of the New Testament. For example, 1 Corinthians 2:9-14 (NLT) gives us another clue to the “discipline” puzzle. “That is what the Scriptures mean when they say, ’No eye has seen, no ear has heard, and no mind has imagined what God has prepared for those who love him.’ But it was to us that God revealed these things by his Spirit. For his Spirit searches out everything and shows us God’s deep secrets…And we have received God’s Spirit (not the world’s spirit), so we can know the wonderful things God has freely given us…we speak words given to us by the Spirit, using the Spirit’s words to explain spiritual truths. But people who aren’t spiritual can’t receive these truths from God’s Spirit. It all sounds foolish to them and they can’t understand it, for only those who are spiritual can understand what the Spirit means.”

Paul is making a unique point often lost when answering this question. The question is not does God discipline, but how. To me, God’s discipline is radically different than the father/son illustration above. And 1 Corinthians backs me up here. First, no plan is ever more important than people – “hurt” for the sake of correction is not okay with God. Secondly, if God does use natural circumstances to correct us, they are at best a second option. God’s first and foremost choice to adjust any Christian’s perspective is the Spirit of God speaking to our spirit. That’s “how we can know the wonderful things God has freely given us.” That’s always God’s first choice and he doesn’t need to create painful circumstances to get our attention.

The problem with our understanding of God’s discipline is that we pass it through the grid of our own parenting – just like the author I quoted did. Plus, we often derive a spiritual lessons from our personal circumstances. And some of those circumstances are so painful that if we don’t create a “greater good” scenario from them, we can’t handle the pain. But when we teach others that God “uses” circumstances to get our attention, we are also saying that he can’t get “close” enough to tell us otherwise. To relegate contact with believers to natural circumstances assumes that God is incapable of direct contact. Or worse yet, God doesn’t want direct contact or happily uses pain for our advancement even though another, more personal route of communication exists.

Old Testament scholars sometimes talk about “controlling metaphors” in the Bible. These are ways or concepts of describing God that disclose his nature or personality that run through all of scripture. And Jesus picks these up as well. He’s not just any father, he’s the good Father. He’s not just any old shepherd, he’s the good shepherd. That’s the problem – when we hear that God is Father, we assume he is just like any other father. But he’s the good Father…and that means he does things in a way that the rest of us dad’s cannot even grasp. That’s what the verses in Hebrews 12:7-10 are attempting to show. The good Father is not doing the “best he knows how” – he’s doing way more than that, bringing correction and discipline exclusive from harm. Jesus says the same thing: “If you being evil know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more…”

Let me use another less-sanitized father/child illustration in contrast to the first one. My oldest daughter just turned 5. She’s conscientious and really tries to do what  her parents ask of her. What would you think of me as a father if I had the distinct option either to “hurt her in order to make her mature” or teach her personally how to be mature…but I still chose to hurt her? What if rather than conversationally teaching her about meekness, I back-handed her hoping to achieve the same affect. Make your stomach turn, huh? Mine too. The issue is in the choice. Many people who assume God uses circumstances, do so thinking that the Spirit speaking to our spirit is really not a viable option. But if it is, then direct communication is God’s desired method of disciplining you. 1 Corinthians says it is. And that doesn’t have to involve punishment…it never should.